Feel Good Voice

This is the best parenting day ever. I’m in the grocery store with my toddler in the seat part of the cart and my three-year-old running loose helping me pick fresh fruit and vegetables. Near the broccoli I met a long-time business acquaintance and asked if he fished a recent tournament we used to organize together. Just then a head of broccoli plops on the ground. He picks it up and tells me his mother died that morning but he got to spend the last few days holding her hand so he missed the tournament. I express my apologies and ask my daughter not to touch things without asking first.

She runs over to the new red potatoes packed in small, clear boxes stacked on top of one another and before I know it, one crashes to the ground and potatoes roll everywhere. Again, my friend picks them up with me. This time I gently pick Cynthia up and say, “I’m sorry Sweetheart, I’ve asked you several times not to touch things unless you ask first. I have to put you in the cart now.”

My friend goes his way and we round the corner near the salad mixes. Cynthia says to me, “Thank you for being kind and gentle Mommy.”

Oh, thank you God for that answer to prayer.

“You’re welcome Sweety. I love you.”

“Mommy, your voice feels good to me.”

With a frog in my throat, I ask, “Oh Cynthia, can I have a hug please?”



You see, I’ve had a battle with anger towards her for the last year and half. It reared its ugly head after our second daughter was born. I had no idea this rage was inside me. I read books, I pray, I am prayed over, I have accountability partners, and I have sought counseling. The work has finally paid off. It’s humbling to know she recognizes the difference and can verbalize her appreciation.

While she has seen me in authority as both gentle and raging, I pray she can decipher when the Lord uses both extremes to get her attention later in life. Did I ever show my anger without it being provoked? No. Does God? No. Am I provoked and yet still calm, cool, and collected? Yes. Does God extend His grace to us? Yes.

This is in no way to say I am like God. I am far from it. I desperately want to be like His Son that models humility and sacrificial love.

Ephesians 5:6 (NIV) says, “Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath comes on those who are disobedient.” If God’s voice seems harsh or cruel, are you being disobedient?

First Thessalonians 5:9 (NIV) says, “For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ.” Read His holy Word. Receive salvation and hear His voice. It feels good.